roadhockey.net

Ottoman stones opponents

Ottoman missed the first nine weeks of the season recovering from a bout with kidney stones. Sunday, he stoned his opponents, backstopping his team to a decisive 20-13 win in his first start of the season.

It was a remarkable debut for the veteran shotstopper, whose low profile during his extended absence fueled speculation that he had, in fact, retired. By the time he strolled off the court on Sunday, having weathered a late-game lull that cost him a road hockey shutout and made the score closer than it should have been, he had his opponents muttering to themselves, wishing the rumors had been true.

"He doesn't leave much space to shoot at," says Beetle Boy of the resurrected rearguard. "It's frustrating because you maybe hold onto the ball too long looking for that hole."

"Ottoman was good right off the bat, and that caught us early," says Billy Idol.

Indeed, other than whiffing a court-long shot by Elvis that caught him out of position, Ottoman proved a formidable barrier from the opening faceoff, giving his team the confidence to counterattack deep into the offensive zone. Nibs, a notoriously inattentive backchecker, freewheeled in the offensive zone with three straight goals that broke the game wide open even before the sides switched ends for the first time.

"Nibs was just awesome out there," says Ottoman.

"Nibs was on fire," says Pig Farming Forward. "He was able to pick corner and that seemed to make the difference early in game and gave us lots of confidence. We had the momentum after first period was over."

They never let up, stretching their lead to as large as ten goals and sending their opponents to the sidelines swearing at each other and cracking their sticks on the concrete.

"We just let the other team beat themselves up," says Pig Farming Forward.

"We let ourselves get into a big hole," says Beetle Boy, who returned to the courts after he missed last week's game. "We just didn't seem to have any continuity. We weren't getting any bounces, it seemed the ball would hit us and go right to their sticks for a breakaway."

With Kid and Bird playing their patented give-and-go with aplomb, and Lak Attack deking and dancing through flatfooted defenders, they rarely missed.

"I had a good team in front of me," says Ottoman. "We never really trailed, so it was a nice game for us."

Ottoman's unexpected arrival at the courts created a goalie crisis of a different sort for the first time this season; too many shotstoppers!

Lobsterboy, suffering the lingering effects of an infection, was only too happy to relinquish his position between the pipes, while Billy Idol jumped at the chance to score his first goal of the season. And while he was ultimately credited with that goal when Cowboy Bill accidently shot the evil orange plastic ball into his own net while trying to clear a pass from the edge of the crease, he wasn't entirely satisfied with his effort.

"Today it was hard to get things going," said Idol. "It's hard to get those sprints back because when you're in goal you get tired, but you don't get winded."

Lobsterboy left the game after a handful of shifts and he'll likely be out of the lineup for an extended stretch as he prepares for the imminent arrival of his latest crawbaby.

•••••

Pig Farming Forward returned to the lineup to tenderfoot his way around the slippery court and tenderize the shins of opposing forwards. But his thoughts were with his side's returning rearguard.

"As goalie, I know what it's like to play first game," said the gimped goaltender. "You need to get first few shots in glove before you feel confident."

After the game, PFF announced he'll miss most of January, as he travels out of town to service the onerous demands of his exploitative employer.

Posted by jaysuburb at December 12, 2004 03:08 PM