April 11, 2004

Pig Farmer makes his case

Pig Farming Goalie was all set to start a letter-writing campaign to make his case to be allowed to play in this Spring's Stanley Cup Championship series. Instead, the agrarian goaltender, who made his first start between the pipes Sunday after missing most of the season with a knee injury and work commitments, let his pads do the talking.

The barn-slopping shotstopper stood tall as his teammates floundered early, buying them time to twice battle their way back from six goal defecits, eventually tying the game at 18. And while they ultimately succumbed, 20-18, Pig Farmer's message was clear; he's back and opposing forwards "better be ready."

"He played a pretty amazing game," says Elvis, one of those forwards who was frustrated time and again as Pig Farming Goalie stabbed his pads into the firing range and sprawled acrobatically across the crease to smother rebounds.

"It was like Vimy Ridge, just bullets," says Pig Farming Goalie of the early barrage. "I think I help out team by being able to frustrate them. Lots of their shots were down low and they weren't able to get ahold of rebounds and momentum just shifted."

"We had to tighten up a little bit and stop coughing it up to them," says New Guy of his side's early difficulties that dug them into an 8-2 hole, despite Pig Farmer's goaltending heroics.

Most of the damage was inflicted by the line of Lak Attack, Nibs and the Colonel, who launched rapier blasts from the point and then cycled speedily to pounce on rebounds or sloppy clearing attempts.

"They were definitely the go-ahead line," says Elvis of the fearsome trio. "We just wanted to shoot lots, try to get as many balls on net as we could from everywhere."

"It's tough to contain a line like that," says New Guy. "They move it around, all three of them can cycle in from the point and they've all got huge shots. Your goalie has to come up big, that's for sure."

That's just what Pig Farming Goalie did, keeping the score within reach until his mates could find their own rhythm. And as the evil orange plastic ball softened up in the early Spring heat, the bounces started going their way. They battled their way back to within a goal, slipped again and then fought to get even for the first time in the game, at 18.

"The bounces stopped going their way," says New Guy. "The ball just started going in for us."

"We just had patience on ball," says Pig Farming Goalie. "With hard work we got a couple of flukey goals. We can't quit."

Especially Billy Idol, who seemed to get fired up after getting decked by Lak Attack with an accidental butt end to his cheek. After missing the rest of his shift to gather his senses and dab the blood from beneath his eye, he returned to the court with renewed energy and determination, driving hard to the net, forechecking relentlessly, rattling his opponents and creating opportunities for his linemates.

"Billy Idol had a pretty big second half, and that just seemed to fire up the rest of their team," says Elvis. "Some of the players found a little something extra somewhere."

But it just wasn't quite enough. Moments after Kid lifted a shot just wide of the post on a breakaway that would have given his team their first lead of the game and put them within a goal of writing the final chapter to their storybook comeback, Bird gathered a loose ball along the boards, spun to avoid a charging defender and ripped a seeing-eye shot that handcuffed Pig Farming Goalie.

"It happened so quick, it was hard to think about it," says the comeback creaseminder. "We were so close at end, I feel badly for my team."

And while the final score might not have gone his team's way, Pig Farming Goalie says he's earned a commissioner's exemption to waive the six-game requirement to make him elligible to play in the season's finale series.

"Today I just wanted to play positionally. I actually feel pretty good. I think it was good game for me to come back."

Posted by jaysuburb at April 11, 2004 05:48 PM
Comments

Shouldn't you guys be rioting, or something????

Posted by: Living Legend at April 18, 2004 07:55 AM

Douse the Flames! Douse the Flames! 3 OT periods to douse the Flames!

Posted by: TheColonel at April 18, 2004 01:04 AM

so i'm on the couch with my ass clenched so hard the pillow i'm sitting on is disappearing. I was supposed to be at a cabaret on Granville Island two hours ago. sorry brahm. But it's triple overtime.
then Brendan Morrison drags the puck behind calgary's net, protecting it with his body. a quick pass gets mired against the boards between Nasland and a flame, #26. Brendan grabs it again, spins away from his check. His legs must be burning after 90 minutes of hockey already. He sprints out in front of the net, Kiprusoff goes down, Brendan waits and waits and....
...Game seven. Monday night.

Posted by: pfg at April 18, 2004 12:50 AM

If im correct in guessing what 'that secret name' is -no.

'That' particular indusrty has been shut down for 60 days to evaluate a recent epidemic infection suspected to have hit nearly 50 of its most 'talented' actors and actresses ...not that I follow 'that' industry closely or anything.

See you all next week...

Posted by: Elvis at April 16, 2004 05:11 PM

Alas, I will be unable to attend on sunday...there's no point in even saying why after Otto's post. Another week of rest should do the shoulder good as well. Have a good one guys!

Posted by: Unabomber at April 16, 2004 12:32 PM

Elvis, sounds mysterious, are you filming more yoga videos, or are you delving into the secret world of the love that does not dare speak its name?

Posted by: lobsterboy at April 14, 2004 01:27 PM

I will also be missing next weeks game... although my reasons arent as good as ottos.

Posted by: Elvis at April 14, 2004 11:37 AM

LoL, no kidding. Make sure you give him some brewskies & a platter of Krispy Kremes!

Posted by: Unabomber at April 13, 2004 10:32 PM

BTW, Otto, that may be the best excuse for missing Sunday Morning Road Hockey. Ever.

Posted by: Living Legend at April 13, 2004 12:45 PM

Hey, invite him out to the game!

Posted by: Living Legend at April 13, 2004 12:27 PM

Looks like I'm out for next Sunday's game, I just realized that I'm meeting the Dalai Lama that day.

PFG, sorry to hear about the heat exhaustion. I had a bad headache that afternoon as well. Good to hear the knee is holding up well though. Good luck next week!

Posted by: ottoman at April 13, 2004 12:08 PM

ya knee feels goot. but suffered from heat exhaustion during late evening. nauseous, splitting headache. never been married; now know what it feel like...
ready for action next week tho

Posted by: pfg at April 13, 2004 12:50 AM

Ditto.

Ottoman was no slouch either. Looks like the goalies are getting their gameface on for the home stretch.

Posted by: Living Legend at April 12, 2004 11:01 PM

Great game PFG, hope your knee feels OK today.

Posted by: Newguy at April 12, 2004 03:26 PM